Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Reflecting Year 2009


It's hard to believe, that the end of 2009 is upon us. Every year and time seems to be the same but it always has something different to offer in our lives. I find the years seem to go faster. I was wondering maybe because I live my life to its fullest, full of hopes, and trials but I am learning a lot as I go along my way.

I would say that this year adversity has tested me on almost every aspect of my life. But the good thing is that I came out alright as I always do. I have learned to deal with it and won most of the battle with the guidance of my mom's prayer all the time. I've realized that being strong is never easy having to deal with myself and others. I know, I'd wrote some personal things on my blog, that's how I deal with myself being human who are pack with emotions. I find writing to be therapeutic especially when I'm going through tough times. It seems to help me get rid of all the bad thoughts and emotions that has been bugging me and helps me face each new day with positive attitude. It's what it takes for me to stay strong. I don't limit myself to anything including my weaknesses. So, for those people who sneaks here on my blog and make some gossips. I really don't give a darn, because it would not do me any harm. I considered my trials as a joyful challenged instead of a painful process.

Anyhow, things I want to do for this year has been done and I am close to finishing it. Other than that, I am still very thankful having my family over here. Even though we went through some tough times but we have work it out, especially with my sister. Adversity in life is testing her causing her to go astray in life a little bit. Call me a bad and controlling sister but I could not just close my eyes and let her keep going. I did some hurtful things and had said some things I should not say to make my point. We wind up hurting each other. It took her a while to get back on the right track but she finally did. I am now glad and proud of her. She got her own apartment and standing on her own. People who did her wrong are starting to suffer with their own actions. Goodness and hard prayers still prevails.

As to myself, I've learned to forgive and deal people with love and understanding. Even to those that hurt you. I've learned to apply the knowledge, I've learned on my psychology. If I probably don't have the background of understanding human behaviors, I probably will be making situations worse. Emotions are hard to battle if you don't have the wisdom. While I was going through with it, I have to suppress my own emotions just to give way for others. It's really hard! I throw a fret and cried a little bit but after that I was over with it. I guess, all these experiences had made me even stronger. I just hope next year, 2010 will treat me better. LOL! Actually, I'm seriously looking forward to the next chapter in my life and content in the knowledge that 2010 has new opportunities to offer that yet to be discovered.

Monday, November 30, 2009

What Defines Attitude?



The entries below are for the gossipers. Hope they'll get something out of this. Being bored and have nothing to do in their lives. What do you think they're going to be expert of? It is understandable but I do pity them.




Everything begins with the resolve to take the first step. From that action, wisdom arises and change begins. Without action, nothing changes.

S
o many of life's conflicts find their origin and cause in envy. Envy ruins and destroys people's hearts.

Carelessness, overconfidence and arrogance are our greatest enemies.


Unless we view things with our heart, we can see nothing. If we look at the world with a love of life, the world will reveal its beauty to us.


Not to advance is to regress.


Being pretentious, hiding your weaknesses and failing to reflect on yourself will only limit your growth and potential.


Those who face adversity with hope and the willingness to try their very best don't consider the process painful. People who exert themselves to the fullest and tackle each problem as it arises don't really experience hardships as such; they instead see everything as a joyful challenge.

None of us can exist in isolation. Our lives and existence are supported by others in seen and unseen ways, be it by parents, mentors or society at large. To be aware of these connections, to feel appreciation for them, and to strive to give something back to society in a spirit of gratitude is the proper way for human beings to live.

Gratitude makes a person modest. A sense of gratitude expands the heart.


Make today blossom in the manner most appropriate to the person you uniquely are!


I
t is not difficult circumstances that defeat one, but one's own weakness.


If you want to understand the causes made in the past, look at the results as they are manifest in the present. And if you want to know what results will be manifest in the future, look at the causes that exist in the present. The reality of your future self is forged by current action, in your behavior now.

Lies are truly frightening, because they not only deceive others but also destroy one's own humanity.

The place where you are now is vital. Never avoid what you must face. Challenge your circumstances and steadily persevere. The path toward victory opens from where you stand.


It is human nature to desire recognition and to want to look better than what we are. When that desire seizes control of us, it is easy to lose sight of who we are and what our real purpose is. Spiritual corruption begins from there. The best thing is to be true to one's heart.


"Dig beneath your feet, there you will find a spring." The place where you are now is crucial. Never try to avoid that which you must do.


When your determination changes, everything will begin to move in the direction you desire. The moment you resolve to be victorious, every nerve and fiber in your being will immediately orient itself toward your success. On the other hand, if you think, "This is never going to work out," then at that instant every cell in your being will be deflated and give up the fight. Then everything really will move in the direction of failure.


The ungrateful feel that it is below them to show any kind of appreciation. They are under the delusion that showing gratitude to others diminishes their own worth. But it is this sense of appreciation that elevates, enriches and expands the human spirit. A lack of gratitude is actually a sign of arrogance.


Those who are always complaining about their circumstances find that success continually eludes them. As do those who speak ill of others or who make excuses for their failures.


It is senseless to blame others or your environment for your miseries. Change begins from the moment you muster the courage to act. When you change, the environment will change. The power to change the world is found nowhere but within our own life.


Life is best lived by being bold and daring. People tend to grow fearful when they taste failure, face a daunting challenge or fall ill. Yet that is precisely the time to become even bolder. Those who are victors at heart are the greatest of all champions.


One of my favorite poets, the Argentine educator Almafuerte (1854-1917) wrote: "To the weak, difficulty is a closed door. To the strong, however, it is a door waiting to be opened." Difficulties impede the progress of those who are weak. For the strong, however, they are an opportunity to open wide the doors to a bright future. Everything is determined by our attitude, by our resolve. Our heart is what matters most.


We have both a weak self and a strong self; the two are completely different. If we allow our weak side to dominate, we will surely be defeated.


If you always have a shallow perspective and pay attention only to trivial things, you are sure to get bogged down in all kinds of petty worries and concerns, and not be able to move forward. Even relatively minor hurdles or problems will seem insurmountable. But if you look at life from a broad viewpoint, you naturally spot the way to solve any problem you may confront. This is true when we consider our own personal problems as well as those of society and even the future of the entire world.


Ultimately, our battle is with ourselves. Whether in our activities in society, or whether in historical, political or economic developments, everything essentially boils down to a struggle between positive and negative forces.


Real optimism should not be confused with a carefree outlook on life, one in which we forfeit responsibility for our lives. The person undefeated by misfortune, poverty, insult and vilification. The person who can bounce back from every adversity and say, "What? That was nothing!" The person who marches on toward hope through sheer force of will. That person is a true optimist.


Some people are overly critical of themselves and become listless and unassertive as a result. Rather than engaging in pointless self-flagellation, young people would do best just being what young people are: bold, audacious and gutsy-and throwing themselves entirely into whatever the task at hand.


Trust is difficult to earn and it is easily lost-the trust built over a decade can be shattered in an instant by one offhanded remark or deed. A person who is not swayed from their chosen path, even during the most trying times, will ultimately find that he or she is trusted by all.


As long as we are human, we are bound to make mistakes. We all fall prey to flawed beliefs and views. What distinguishes a forward-looking person from an intransigent one, a virtuous person from a dishonest one, however, is whether one can candidly admit to one's mistakes and take bold steps to redress them.


It's foolish to be obsessed with past failures. And it's just as foolish to be self-satisfied with one's small achievements. The present and the future are what are important, not the past. ... Those who neglect this spirit of continual striving will start to veer off in a ruinous direction.


Cheerfulness is not the same as frivolity. Cheerfulness is born of a fighting spirit. Frivolity is one manifestation of cowardly escape.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Perceiving Myself

Oh boy! I am now to look back on my past, evaluate my present, and predict my future based on the work I've put in it. I am now to end my psychology course and we are required to present a project about how we perceived each others life transition. I really find it very interesting. And psychology is my favorite among all the courses I took. I was even thinking after I finish my bachelor's degree of nursing, that I would work on being a doctor of psychology. I like to discover things that I mostly enjoy in life and enhance it. Anyway, below is what I have come up for myself.


Perceiving Myself


I perceived my past thru a poem. It was written when I was 19 years old. When I wrote this, I was kind of depressed and trying to be positive and determined to make life better at that point of time.


MY LIFE


I can live through the trials that life may throw my way,

I always stay thankful, day after day.

But sometimes I just want to lie down and die,

for hours and hours I sit there and cry.


Loves and losses, both come and go,

I learned from both, and it helps me grow.

My life isn't as bad as I make it to be,

but sometimes that's hard to see.


I have happy moments along with the sad,

not to mention the frustrating and bad.

But my life is on the right track,

its more or less white rather than black.


I can deal with what life throws my way,

no matter what I feel or say.

I thank God for blessing me,

because when things get bad, I always find a way.


Thanks to everyone who helped me along the way,

my future is brighter, sunnier than gray.

I'm looking forward past the pain,

My future is busy, I have so much to obtain!


Perceiving my present:

I compared my life now into 2 things:

  • an umbrella (the softer side of me)

  • a wasp (the tough side of me)


I would say that my life is like an umbrella because I've always been the shelter of people in times of need, most especially my family. I am like the roof over their heads so they don't get rained on. A provider, a leader, and a do-it-all type of person. Basically, I take care of everybody. That is the type of role that I have always run into ever since I became a young adult, and even now. I don't know why- I am thinking that it might really be my purpose in life. It is really hard to do all these things at one time, such as providing for others while you are pursuing your own dreams. But I know in the end, I will be blessed.


I've always been a people person. And in choosing my career, I even prefer something that deals with helping and taking care of others because it's what I am good at. That's why I am on the nursing field. It just felt like this is something that will make me happy and it's something I will do well, while at the same time providing purpose in my life. My present job deals with people that have special needs and I really enjoy it. And I have now made up my mind that this is what I want to do - not only because of the money thing; but it's where my passion and heart is.





And on the other aspect of my life regarding with my personal qualities, I compare myself to a wasp because I can be mean. I can be the sweetest person you will ever know but there is a part of me that you don't want to mess with. In pursuing my goals, I am always determined and will put all my energy into it until I get exactly the result that I wanted, by any means... ( despite all odds!). And if someone will try to pull me down, that person should beware because he is going to get his ass stung.


Perceiving my future:

I look at myself being a nurse and making a difference in other peoples lives. I see myself successful in all the things I am trying to do, such as having a good relationship with family and friends, and last but not the least, being physically & mentally fit. So hopefully, it's a future where I can look back and say I have done all the best out of life and I can label myself being happy and successfully aging.


Conclusion:


I believe that life is like a blank slate that is waiting for you to write something new upon . We are here to provide meaning in our own lives through the choices we make. Life is sometimes a hard road to travel in which we find ourselves in the constant changing, shifting, unfolding, unpredictable, and vibrant journey. Being oneself, takes a lot of courage but in return you will learn to exhibit qualities of fluidity, flexibility, adaptability, spontaneity, and inductive thinking that will get you through whatever hurdles that life may bring. I am very blessed and equipped with beauty, brain, talent, and endurance. I have a high self-esteem and I take pride in everything I do. However, I tried to use my gifts in a simple and humble way. After all, we are here to provide meaning in our own life as well as provide meaning for others. It's what I think life is all about.





Saturday, October 10, 2009

VIVALDI: The Four Seasons

I am taking a music course and I started to appreciate music of the centuries especially during the Baroque Era's. I got fascinated with this music because few years ago while I was pregnant with my son; I've been listening to music from Bach and Vivaldi. It is supposed to make the baby smart according to scientific studies. I never knew that this song has a poem behind it. And it is really beautiful.





I. Allegro

Joyful spring has arrived,
the birds greet it with their cheerful song,
and the brooks in the gentle breezes
flow with a sweet murmur.

The sky is covered with a black mantle,
and thunder and lightning announce a storm.
When they fall silent, the little birds
take up again their melodious song.

II. Largo

And in the pleasant, flower meadow,
to the gentle murmur of bushes and trees,
the goatherd sleeps, his faithful dog at his side.

III. Allegro (rustic dance)

To the festive sounds of a rustic bagpipe
nymphs and shepherds dance in their favorite spot
when spring appears in its brilliance.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Career Change

It was a pretty interesting day for me today. In two weeks, I should be going back to school but something just came up and I am probably moving to another school (Lady of the Lake) of this semester. I will be processing my papers including the transfer of my scholarship by next week. "Lady of the Lake" is supposed to be a better school for my nursing field. This is where I was recommended to go. I got an offer to be in a military air force nurse. By October, I will be taking an exam, then go for my physical fitness, so on, and so forth. Today was a new start for me to make another big decision in my life. I am still confused and I'm going to be doing a lot of thinking until December. They have to know before January of next year, so they could start setting me up for my semester being in the air force. I really got excited about this. If I decide to pursue this, in front of me are huge opportunities. They will pay my tuition, books, gas expenses, and almost everything that I need. And the package of the whole thing is that I get a work out almost every day which I really like to do. Then, when I get finish, I get to travel around the world. And also, I can learn on how to fly a plane, and I get to go to the LSU - (known as the "Harvard in the South") for my classes and a lot more. Of course, I still have to undergo some tough trainings and I don't know how I am going to do with that. But they told me not to worry about it. I will be fine. I already had a meeting with the captain of the air force today and he said, I should have no problem getting into it. He even added, “you don't have to look tough, but you will be built tough". He said: main thing they need are "critical thinkers". Can you believe? Me? A smart thinker? he he...we will see about that. I will also be tested on how I will react on different situations under pressure. If I pass it, this might be the right road for me.

Anyway, regardless of what my decision will be on this whole thing. I am going to stay put and finish my semesters needed to be a full pledge nurse, and on the side of it, I will probably be adding up semesters for the air force. Just in case I decide to turn my back on it. I won't lose anything. I also think that it's time to seek guidance to the Lord. I got all kinds of opportunities laid in front of me. It's just a matter of making the right choice.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

DJ and Nath



Aren't they cute? Alright! But they can be a pain in the butt too. Babysitting this two in the same house is a chaos. We consider it the toughest job of all. They are worse than a dog and a cat. If they are together, fighting never fails because whatever stuff the other one got, the other wants it too. They are both brave. Nobody owes anything and they both retaliate. They won't stop till they get even with each other. I was even thinking of getting them a pair of boxing gloves. Whoever watches this two will surely be stress out. I experienced it myself and it wasn't easy. I even decided, "That’s it"! No more kids for me. he he he!

My sister, mommy, and I had given up to put this two in the same place. We finally got them separated. If my sister is at work, her mother-in law watches DJ and if I am at work mommy watches Nathaniel or sometimes my sister does if mommy is sick. I am so glad I got my mom and sister with me. They are a lot of help. Only right now, my mom is very sick her illness finally taking a toll of her. Sis and I are the one taking turns taking care of mommy. We might need a 24 hrs. caretaker for her very soon but I refused to put her in the nursing home though. Lote (my sister) and I are trying to do what's best for mommy. We've decided to just petition one brother this year to temporarily take care of her while we both work and I am still finishing school. I don't know how we will be able to manage it again this year but I believe we can get through it, as long as we both work as a team.

Anyway, these two boys are very sweet in nature. They just got the AMORO genes of being a fighter. They just now starting to get along a little better but they still fight when something arise. I hope they can be best friends when they grow up. I know they have too, because they live next to each other. They don't really have much of a choice. My sister and DJ are going to live within my property. I just wish she don't get remarried (right now, going through divorce) and move to another place. I will be sad. I liked to have all of my family in my sight so we can look out for each other. It's what I am trying to do in the future. I already got the land I needed more than enough to occupy them. And I know, it is still a far way to go because it takes time and money to get the rest of them. There are three in my family that is going to be a nurse that includes me. It's what I am hanging on to fulfill this goal. I just hope and pray that nobody is going to go astray. So, we can work all together as a team.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Had a long day....

I really had a long stressful day today. I got into an argument with the person I work with. I can't believe I was able to say some words that I should not be saying. I mean saying curse words. Ohhhhhh.... It feels good though! Really good! That I was able to strike back in an instant. I used to be the calm and quiet type of the person but not anymore. I guess I just had enough of her crap.

Anyhow, I still have some good kind of day because my new laptop came in today and I like it a lot. I now have 3 laptops. I know that's just too much. I have an obsession problem when it comes to computers. Nothing's wrong with my 2 laptops. Both of them are fairly new. I already had given away the other one to my sister though and I am still thinking what to do with the other. I don't want to get rid of it yet because I still have some important files left with it. I might just have to keep it in case I miss how comfortable it is to use a wide screen also.

I've decided to buy a new one because I think I need it in school. Laptop is something that I got to have all the time. I don't like the older ones because they are heavy for me. It weighs about 7-8 lbs. while with my new one; it only weighs 2lbs. -such a big difference! It is only 10 inches wide and I can even just put it in my purse. It is very handy. With me carrying thick books for my class, I definitely need to invest another that is lighter to lessen my load. It should end my complaints how my back is killing me due to carrying heavy stuff. So, I'm happy now! I finally got what I wanted. Spoiled! he he! In fairness, I work hard to get it!